Relationship Coach Blog

You have probably heard of an excellent book by Norman Vincent Peale called, “The Power of Positive Thinking.” Using his ideas, people can make themselves more attracted to their own lives (i.e. become happier).  Reading the book won’t make you happy.  But making the changes he recommends can.

There is also a power in positive talking. That power is drawing other people to us.  People are drawn to positive people and repelled by negative people.  To attract more people into your life, start to talk positively.  Doubt, suspicion, negativity, complaining, gossip, sharing bad news (like from the “newspaper”) are all negative.  It may at times fascinate and titillate people, but because you are the one saying the bad things, those things eventually get associated with you.

There are millions of examples, but here are just a few:

Negative:  “It’s supposed to be rainy and cold all day tomorrow.”

Positive:  “I’m looking forward to seeing the flowers of spring.”

Negative:  “This food really isn’t bad.”

Positive:  “This food tastes really good.”

Negative:  “You look handsome except for that old tie.”

Positive:  “You look handsome.”

These are three examples of ways to be positive. The first choosing a positive topic, the second is leaving out the negative words (e.g. “bad”), and the third is emphasizing the positive.

Carry a small index card with you for a week and make a little mark on it every time you say something positive.  Self-monitoring your positive statements will increase your positive talk.  Do not monitor your negative statements.  Whatever we monitor, whether in ourselves or in others, is what will tend to grow.

You can either program yourself or be programmed by others. With your relationship coach, create some slogans for yourself that will help you to become more positive.